The Thing Called Love

So here is our lil' lady, monkey, jumping bean, Cor Cor, Cora belle, sugar lips...we have lots of nicknames for her already. Most of you have probably already seen these pictures in the last week considering I have shown them to everyone (including their dog, cat and parakeet). It is one thing to know you have a baby inside, and to even feel her moving. It is a totally different level of realization once you see their precious little face. The more I look at these pictures the more I am convinced she looks like her daddy, which makes him very happy. We had so much fun watching her during her 3D sonogram last week. She yawned a lot and even smiled a few times. She also punched me the entire time with balled up fists and it kept making the sonogram technician laugh. At least I now know it is her little fists punching me instead of her feet kicking, not that it makes it any better. I hope she's not already mad at me. I didnt include a belly shot this week because it has basically remained the same. I am hoping it doesn't get much bigger. I have heard enough "Whoa you are huge" to last me the rest of my life.
So, like I said, seeing Cora's face got me even more excited that she is almost here, but for days I had this new feeling of anxiety that I couldnt put my finger on. I went through all the typical anxieties...am I scared about the birth? No. Am I scared that something will be wrong with her when she comes out? Not really. Finally, after much thought, I was able to figure it out. I am anxious about how much I will love her. I know this sounds nutty (I've never been accused of being normal) but give me a second to explain. I know how much I love her now without even meeting her yet, so I cant even fathom how I will feel once she is here in the world for me to hold and take care of. I know what intense love is already, but this is different. The love I feel for my parents is one example, but that is a love I have always known, there was no beginning. The love I feel for my husband is different also. It intensified as I got to know him. But this love is something that will come the second she is born and will be at the highest intensity right off the bat that I am scared my heart may actually explode. Thank goodness I will already be in the hospital. Anyway, that is how I have been feeling the last couple of weeks and I keep trying to remind myself that I have to take a deep breath, relax and just go with the flow. Man, I am the worst with anticipating things!
I am now 31 weeks pregnant and the Braxton Hicks contractions are in full swing. For those of you who have never been pregnant, BH contractions dont hurt, your stomach just gets really tight for about a minute and then goes back to normal. Its really hard to explain..it just feels "weird". Its just contractions that prepare your body for real contractions once the time is here. As much as I want her to be here ASAP, I really hope she doesn't make her arrival until at least after May 8th. I am flying down to Orange County (dont worry, my midwife said its ok) on April 28th through May 2nd for my baby shower weekend. My sister, her husband and their baby Savannah are flying in from Texas and my cousin Onnolee is coming in from Florida just for the shower, so I will be damned if I miss that! Also, the weekend after that my mom is getting married. Unfortunately I cant go because I will be 37 weeks pregnant by then and she is getting married in Vegas. Vegas is no place for hella preggo chicks. So anytime after that, Cora is more than welcome to show her pretty little face.

Until next time folks...see ya!